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Today I had the sudden realization that in exactly two weeks I will be 25 years old.

Weird.

*edit* I'm not so much weirded out about the 25 thing- I'm weirded out about about almost being 25 and FORGETTING IT WAS ABOUT TO HAPPEN.

Get it? Tudor? Two-door? Coupes have two doors, whereas a sedan has... oh, never mind.

So, yes! I have embarked on a new sewing project! This time, I'm going for Tudor nobility. Because Tudor nobility is pretty and I am ( insane )

So I was sitting at the Faery Fest pub sing with Nick, listening to Nero's Fiddle. They were singing Roll Your Leg Over, which I have explained previously but shall do so again for our new listeners. All the verses esentially go like so:

If all them young laddies/lassies were (non sexual objects)
I'd be the (related object) and (perform an action that relates and sounds dirty)

So, for example:

If all them young laddies were little white flowers
I'd be the bee and I'd suck them for hours

It's a drinking song, so we make up more verses as we go along and there's about ninety gabillion of them. Are we all up to speed? Good.

I had just interjected a verse and had sat down again, when the second oldest McGrotty child tugged on my sleeve, telling me I should sing the verse she was about to give me. Please keep in mind she is about six years old:

If all the boys were sitting on the toilet
EEEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!!!!!!!!

I gently declined, as I had just sung.

LATER! Nero's Fiddle sang "The Cock Song," which is about a missing rooster named Dick. Clearly.

But the second youngest had other ideas. "It's not about a chicken," she informed me. "It's about a... uh..." She paused, thinking very very hard. I was kind of scared she'd be right.

"A rooster?" I suggested hopefully.

"No! It's a... it's a, um..." she covered her eyes with her hands, then flipped them open as though she was playing peek-a-boo. "Cock!"

I think I may have snorted, trying not to laugh. She did it again. "Cock!"

Having a five year old cheerfully chirping "Cock! Cock!" at you is... kind of weird.

(editor's note: I totally forgot to post this. Gregor's Crossing was two weekends ago, now. And I still have to write up the Morrisburg rundown! Baaaaah...)

The first faire of the season was this past weekend- Gregor's Crossing out in Chatham. Yes, I'm only getting around to writing this now. I was Maggie Greystone, the baker's daughter. Once again I scared myself at just how incredibly stupid I can act. By the second day it was determined that nobody can think like me... it's dangerous to your health.

In previous years, I've done little rundowns of all the nifty things that happened at the festivals- a sort of synopsis of all the funny and amusing experiences I had. At this faire, there were just too dang many, I couldn't even really process them all at the end of the day.

( So you're just getting the highlights. )

"You- you will be a great fashion designer."

I looked up from the little dress doodles I was drawing as I ate my lunch. A woman, maybe forty or fifty years old, was standing next to my table. This was several days ago, so my exact memory of her appearance has faded, and all I really get is an impression of grey hair, red face, purple clothes and a general circularness.

"Excuse me?"

"You will be a great fashion designer. I can tell. You will be. You know what you can do? You can wear a hat... with a long feather down the back, like a pony tail. You can have that idea for free.

"You could be a fashion model. I used to be a fashion model, and I still could be if I lost a hundred pounds. Don't you think I could be a fashion model?" She paused and stared intently at me.

"Um...?" was my highly intelligent response.

"You have beautiful eyes. They- they say that fashion models all have bad eyesight; glasses hide the loveliest eyes. You should never cut your hair. Cutting your hair is bad luck. The 6/49 jackpot tonight is $16 million. You should buy a ticket with Encore, and you'll win, and you can open a very successful fashion house and be a fashion model. Did you see the Yves St. Laurent collection? They showed it last night on CTV. It was terrible. You will do better. You have a beautiful smile, you don't need lipstick. I see you have some bread and meat there. You shouldn't eat so much bread and meat. You should eat more greens and salads. Bread and meat builds up in your colon. I can't eat whole wheat. I know. I know you will be a great fashion designer."

At this point she wandered away.

Apparently, I have some sort of crazy person magnet about my person. How else would they all find me?

(Please note that the 6/49 jackpot that night was NOT $16 million, but it was on Saturday. I'm kind of kicking myself for not buying a ticket)

My costume for Gregor's Crossing! It's done! At least all of the important nakedness hiding parts are done. I still have to do the veil, but that's pretty much just hemming a rectangle and making two tubes.

It's done! It has facings and top stitching and hemming and EVERYTHING! I totally thought it would take me another two weeks- my hand stitching is getting much faster.

Oh there were fearful parts along the way- remembering (after buying the fabric) that linen shrinks, not being able to get the stupid hem level on the tunic, plus the usual "which side is the right side again?" problems I tend to have with sewing. But now it's DONE and I can be full of joy.

Pictures will follow. Now I sleep.

In my continuing quest to be stingy, I enlisted my Mom to help me make a dress form today. My previous attempt to make a dress form from duct tape... didn't work as planned. It got crushed, and stretched, and in the end had measurements that weren't in the slightest bit like my own.

Poking about on the internet, I found another technique- wrapping yourself in plaster bandages to get a solid form which is used as a mold, then making a paper mache positive from said mold.

This did not go so well. It started off as a lovely day, so I put on a garbage bag as a dress so I didn't cover myself in plaster. It was a lovely sunny day, so we laid out a drop cloth on the deck and then I had Mom cover said garbage bag in the bandages.

Not sure what we did wrong, but the plaster would. Not. Dry.

Making things better, it got cloudy and the temperature dropped. You all may have thought it was a lovely day, but you weren't wearing a garbage bag and being covered in wet bandages with icy plaster dripping down your legs, were you?

We started at around three and cut me out of the silly thing at 5:30 because my back and feet were in agony from staying still so long. It took nearly 15 minutes (or at least that's what it seemed like) to cut me out of the stupid thing, at which point I nearly collapsed.

I dragged myself upstairs, drew a bath that was as hot as it would go, then promptly fell asleep in the tub.

Oh yeah, and screw being Thrifty McGee. I'm buying a freakin' dress form.

If you decided just to skip to the end, I'll sum the whole thing up for you. Today, my Mom got me plastered, I wore a garbage bag, then I collapsed and passed out.

I forgot to celebrate Pi day, but hooray for the Ides of March!

Copy the questions, etc etc etc.

LAST SHOW ADDED TO YOUR RESUME:
"Jekyll and Hyde: The Musical." Finally have a musical on my resume, even though I only played chorus.

LAST SHOW YOU AUDITIONED FOR:
"Jekyll and Hyde: The Musical." Woo!

DID YOU GET IT:
Uh... yes.

LAST SONG YOU USED AT AN AUDITION:
All That Jazz and As If We Never Said Goodbye. Showing off my low register is fun!

FAVORITE MUSICAL(s):
Depends on what I've seen most recently.

FAVORITE PLAY(s):
Ibid.

FAVORITE ROLE YOU'VE PLAYED, AND FROM WHAT SHOW?
Mad Mary Teach. Everything clicked for that character.

FAVORITE ROLE OVERALL THAT I WOULD LOVE TO PLAY:
Beatrice in Much Ado About Nothing
Rosalind in As You Like It

SUPERSTITION:
Do NOT say the M word!

YOUR GOAL IN SHOW BUSINESS:
To be remembered.

FAVORITE DIRECTOR(s) YOU HAVE EVER WORKED WITH:
Oh gosh... Tom Plott, Mike McLay, Chris Rosser, Matt Moore, Anjie Schwartz, Steph Davidson... the list goes on.

WHAT WAS YOUR VERY FIRST SHOW?:
"The Jolly Christmas Postman." I played Mama Bear.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A DANCE SOLO?:
Nope. But I have choreographed a couple of dances.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A SINGING SOLO?
A couple of lines in Jekyll and Hyde, and I've led a few pub sings.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN THE LAST PERSON TO TAKE A BOW?
Nope.

HAVE YOU BEEN TO NEW YORK?
I was supposed to go, but SOMEBODY went and crashed a plane into a building or two.

HAVE YOU BEEN TO LA?:
No. No real desire to go, either. I'm a theatre girl, not movies.

WHAT'S THE SCARIEST PART OF AN AUDITION?:
I agree with Adri: "The awkward silence as they read your resume and just before they ask you to begin...."

WHAT'S THE BEST PART OF AN AUDITION?:
Nailing it exactly the way I wanted to.

NAME A SHOW YOU WOULD NEVER DO AGAIN:
Louis le Grenouille. I don't speak French.

NAME A SHOW YOU COULD DO FOR YEARS:
That depends on the cast an the direction. I could have done my high school version of R&J forever, but the one week of it I did at Mac was quite enough, thanks.

WHAT ARE YOU AUDITIONING FOR NEXT?
Nothing lined up right now. Until I get something sorted out that I'm living in the general vicinity of the rehearsals, I just can't afford the transportation.

DO YOU KEEP IN TOUCH WITH PAST CAST MEMBERS?:
Most of my friends I met through shows.

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW IMPORTANT IS GETTING PAID?:
Depends on the show and what has been promised. You tell me I'm working for nothing? Fine. You just don't pay me? Screw you.

SOMETHING EMBARRASSING OR UNEXPECTED THAT HAPPENED TO YOU WHILE ON-STAGE?:
The Big Mac with Hamilton Urban Theatre. I had a short fight scene. Thrown against some stairs, watch my children die, say a line, run at one of the murderers, try and hit him, arm is grabbed and twisted behind my back, neck is creepily kissed, shot in the stomach, collapse to ground

Sounds good? Throw in a mike pack falling off, breaking my necklace and scattering pearls and batteries across the stage. Add in a creepy witch who was in the wrong spot so I had to leap over her to hit my mark (there were other witches around, it was the only way to get there). Bad news all around.

WHO IS THE MOST DIFFICULT PERSON (ON STAGE OR OFF) THAT YOU HAVE EVER WORKED WITH?:
Yeah, like I'm going to shoot myself in the foot when I may or may not have to work with said person again.

EVER BEEN NAKED ONSTAGE?:
I've been in lingerie, and I've had my butt fully in view because measuring is for wimps.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN KILLED?:
Only as Lady MacDuff. I lean more towards comedies.

BEEN DRUNK?:
Never played drunk, definitely never been drunk on stage.

PLAYED SOMEONE HALF YOUR AGE?:
Characters who act half my age, yes. Hellooooooo Lettie!

PLAYED SOMEONE TWICE YOUR AGE?:
Niobe from Love of the Nightengale was three times my age. I got very good at age makeup by the time that show ended.

CRIED?
Yup, in Measure for Measure. Which in turn made my Mom cry. Whoops.

FIRED A GUN?
Nope.

BEEN DRENCHED?
Only when it's rained at a Faire.

BEEN IN A DREAM SEQUENCE?
Does Midsummer's Night Dream count?

BEEN KISSED?:
Yup. And because at the time I had never had an ACTUAL kiss, I needed lessons. Go me.

ARGH! I'm almost done! I'm so close!

Ba-Zam!

From Nick's doublet

Nick's doublet! Woo! The whole thing is lined, the front edge and the collar are all top stitched, everything's pressed, I just have to finish the lacing holes and it's DONE!

Now, on things I've made for myself, this lacing holes have been the quickest thing. However, All the layers of fabric ended up being too thick for the little grommets I had. So I'm doing the stupid things by hand.

I'm doing a pretty good job, on them, though. They're all big enough that the lacing easily passes through them, they're evenly spaced, and the more recent ones even look pretty good.

From Nick's doublet

From Nick's doublet

On each side, there's twenty of those, hand stitched with two strands of embroidery floss. Because of the shine on the fashion fabric, I used one strand each of two different shades of gray. They blend seamlessly. The holes are made with a stiletto, widened with a pair of manicure scissors (put the end of the scissors through the hole, open the scissors and force the weave open) then forced completely open with a knitting needle, which is left in place while I do the first bit of stitching so the hole doesn't close up. No cutting the fabric at all, so it's nice and strong.

I've got 22.5 of the holes done, and I've pretty much mastered my technique so the rest should go smoothly. And now I've jinxed it.

I swear, I was just looking for a box. A simple, oval bentwood box with a hinged handle. It would be nice for holding sewing stuff, and it would be simple and it would not be plastic. I would not feel like a goof carrying it around, and it might even have room for a small project in it.

So I went on e-bay. I searched for "sewing box," other searches having come up with cheese boxes.

And I found this.

I would never be able to convince myself to pay for this, and I would smack anyone who tried to give it to me, but ooooh, it's pretty. And PURPLE!

1- finish doing the lacing holes on Nick's doublet. That's all I have left to do, then it is DONE! I had PLANNED to use grommets, but there were just too many layers of fabric, so I'm doing them by hand. I got four done yesterday, so there's thirty-six holes left to do... this may take a bit.

2- I got my fabric today, so now I need to draft the patterns for my kirtle and tunic.

3- I also need to preshrink the fabric- I have the kirtle fabric ready to go, I just need to do the tunic and the veil (which may end up being a hood, or I just might end up wearing a flower crown and using the fabric to make handkerchiefs... we'll see.)

4- Clean my room. It may not SOUND like a sewing thing, but my bedroom floor is the largest flat surface I have that is safe from the dog. Do you have any idea how hard it is work with fabric that a dog is lying on?

5- get to Michael's and buy crewel yarn (I'm thinking yellow as a nice contrast to the brown collar. I can't seem to get away from brown and yellow, no matter how I try!) to do the embroidery for the over tunic's neckline. That might not get done in time, but even if it isn't I can just bring the frame and a medieval-y sewing kit to the faires and I'll sew and be educational.

6- actually sew the kirtle and tunic. This will probably take the least time out of everything. And now I've jinxed it.

I can get that all done in three months... right?

Necks are difficult and tricky things. Both in the anatomical sense that they are full of important things such as major arteries, tracheae, esophagi, vocal chords and vertebrae, but also in the fact that they are ( very difficult to sew garments for. )

Work is finally coming along on the doublet I'm making for Nick. It was supposed to be for his birthday. His birthday was in June. Whoops. Better late than never?

I was originally going to make it a silver doublet with a canvas interlining, but I decided that since it was a present I should probably do it right. So I used a lighter fabric for the interlining and a nice black fabric for an actual lining. Then I thought that, since the black fabric was so nice, maybe I should make it into a reversible doublet- silver on the one side, black on the other.

I finished cutting out all the pieces of the main body today. I'm going to sew on the skirting, epaulets and collar after I've got the body together.

And just as a note to myself- silver thread in the top thread, black thread in the bobbin. That way, it won't show up. Right? Hopefully?

I hate darts. Hate them hate them hate them.

It's not the sewing- that I can do. Start at the wide end, narrow down the stitch length, press it to the side- boom. Lovely. It's getting the markings onto the fabric that drives me up the wall!

The shirt I was working on is currently in a heap on the opposite side of the room, where I threw it in frustration after the dart I had marked turned out to be uneven, yet again. I'm going to have to wash it before I can try again, because there's so many chalk lines I can't even see what I'm doing anymore. This one is just supposed to be a learning project for the pattern drafting software I bought, but how the heck am I supposed to know if the pattern works when I can even transfer the stupid markings to the stupid cloth? ARGH!

This is why I do Tudor costuming! No stupid darts! I would rather sew a fully boned corset than deal with finicky little darts!

I keep on getting suckered in by the darn things, too. I LOVE the look of fitted button down shirts. I want to have more of them. But I am also on a very strict budget. The only shirt of this style I have been able to find in the past year that fits me was $40. A yard of broadcloth is $4. Which one do you think I'd rather buy?

I just want to sew the stupid shirt. That's all. Grump.

The "If you HAD to" section:

1. If you HAD to get a tattoo, where would you want it?
My leg. Everywhere else is bony, and I have heard that tattoos over bony parts hurt.

2. If you HAD to dye your hair a color what color would it be?
Coppery red. I dyed it last summer and I really liked it, but I'm a blonde at heart.

3. If you HAD to get a piercing (THAT ISN'T YOUR EARS) what would u pierce?
I wouldn't. The ears were bad enough.

4. If you HAD to change your name, what new name would you choose?
Amy. I always liked the name.
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The "WOULD YOU?" section:

1. Would you rather love one person or have many short relationships?
One person.

2.Would you move anywhere else if you could?
Toronto. Or maybe even Hamilton. Somewhere where I know people.

3. If you were given the chance to go to Paris, would you go?
Yes. Duh.

4. If you were given 10 million dollars to keep, what would you do?
Bye bye debt! Then a new wardrobe, and an apartment of my own. Then I'd try to make the rest last as long as possible, so that I can spend my time acting instead of working.

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The "LETS SAY" section:

3. Lets say you had to eat a live tarantula for $1,000...would you?
BLOODY HELL NO. Gah. Never. Ick. Terror.

4. Lets say you could star in any movie (made or in the works) what movie?
The Silver Chair. I wanna be The Lady of the Green Kirtle.

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The "OTHER STUFF" section:

1. What makes your bedroom unique
My sewing corner. It's the only part of the room that's tidy.

4. Whats your favorite season of the year?
I like the fall. Not sunburny, not cold, and it's got Hallowe'en. Sweet.

5. Do you like cheese?
Cheese is delicious tastiness.
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The "THE 2008" section:

1. Have you had your birthday yet?
Yeah. And it sucked. I had pink-eye and had to miss my own party.

2. Are you the same person as you were at the beginning of 2008?
Yup. I'll think I've grown or matured or something, then I'll get smacked in the face with just how much of an introverted socially inept nerd I still am.

3. Are you still in the same job?
Well, I'm at the same job I've had all year. But I'm at a new office. It's purple!

4. Is your favorite color the same color?
I like blue. Yay blue!

5. Have you got the same style/color hair?
Colour, yes, but it's shorter than at the very very beginning of the year.

6. Have you bought a NEW car this year?
Nope. I spend too much on transit to be able to afford a car ($300 a month! ARGH!)

7. Anything exciting happen this year?
I graduated from University and got a real people job! Oh, and I performed at more Canadian renfaires than almost anyone (Kat performed at more than me, but we would have tied if I hadn't been sick for Casa Loma)

8. Have you been involved with the police this year?
Nope.

10. Is your best friend still your best friend?
I'm too socially inept to have a best friend.

11. Got any tattoos or piercings this year?
Not a big fan of pain, so no.

12. Had a haircut this year?
Only one. But holy crap what a haircut!

13. Been in a hospital this year?
Not for me being sick, but I visited my grandma at the hospital before she died.

14. Lost someone you cared about this year?
See question 13, above.

15. Been on a vacation this year ?
I went to renfaires that were far away and I got to stay in a hotel for. Close enough.

16. Been kicked out of a public place this year?
At closing time, but otherwise no.

17. Worst thing to happen this year?
See question 13, above.

18. Best thing to happen this year?
Shmoopiness with Nick. Yay!

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> do you:>
• cut yourself: I have a rather large slice taken out of my finger right now from baking cookies, and a whole heck of a lot of papercuts from filing.
• lick yourself: I am not a tasty treat.
• whine a lot: It's one of my primary methods of communication
• yell a lot: When performing, yes.
• have too many friends: I'm good at making friends, but not at keeping them.
• want to die: Of embarassment, occasionally.
• wear dark colors? Yup. Light colours make me look even paler than I am.
• dye your hair: Only the once.

> have you ever:>
• worn rainbow: Heck yes!
• talked on the phone for over an hour: I can barely manage five minutes
• left the country: Yup, to the states. (Ask me about my trip to New Orleans sometime)
• had a party with over 30 people: There have been such parties at my house when I lived on Broadway, but I was mainly a spectator rather than an organizer.
• stolen something: My dad is not getting back this shirt I'm wearing.
• caught something on fire: only things that should be burning (candles, campfires, etc.)

Last person:
• you touched: Dad
• you talked to: family
• you hugged: Dad
• you kissed: Nick
• you text messaged: Nick (I forgot his phone was broken)
• you callled: Nick
• who called you: ScotiaBank

> info about yourself:>
• what is your birth name? Christine Elizabeth McLeod
•When is your birthday? July 20, 1984
• how tall are you?: 5'8
• shoe size?: 8.5-9
• brothers/sisters?: One older sister
• colors? I'm a Winter!
• soda? Makes me burp. A lot.
• music?: Jonathan Coulton and Dropkick Murphys are on major rotation right now
• ice cream?: Creamsicle Swirl

> in the last 48 hours:>
• cried?: Yup
• missed someone?: yes.
• yelled at someone?: My dog.
• been online: No. I hate the internet.
• kissed someone? Yup. Hee!
• hugged someone?: Yup.
• Last thing you drank? green tea (same answer as Adri. Neat)
• talked to someone about something important? Outside of work, not really.

> okay, last questions:>
• who is sitting next to you? Nobody else is in the room
• Favorite sport? sp...ort?
• been in a plane?: three times total.
• killed someone?: In Reno, just to watch him die.
• kicked your cat for the hell of it? I do not have a cat.
• are you bored of taking this survey? Nope
• what time is it now? 8:47

Ahem.

If you won't let me be in charge then I'm taking my parliament and going HOME! And you guys are MEAN and GANGING UP ON ME! And you've been talking with GILES and that means you LOVE HIM and you're going to MARRY HIM and now you have SEPARATIST COOTIES.

LA LA LA I can't HEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAR YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU.

I'm a moron. I couldn't find my iPod all week. It wasn't in my bag. It wasn't in my coat pocket where I usually keep it. I thought I'd left it at the theatre, but it wasn't there.

Well I found it. In the wash. Crappity crappity crappity crap. This is why I can't have nice things.