Blah Diddy Blah Blah Blah

TRAUMATIZED!!!!!!!

Tue, 20 Oct 2009 02:24:14 GMT

My Mom cleaned my room while I was at work.

I don't know where anything is.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The man at Tim Hortons

Fri, 09 Oct 2009 02:06:39 GMT

I went to Tim Hortons after work today. Surprise, surprise.

As I stood in line, I noticed a man. He was standing by the bar-type counter they have along the one wall, where there are tall chairs for seating. The man was south Asian, and wore a maroon turban with a yellow feather in the front. He wore grey sweatpants tucked into his socks. He wore a tweed sports coat with a large and expertly rendered pencil drawing of an eye carefully safety pinned to the back.

He had a wrapped drinking straw delicately placed in his right ear. For some reason I find the fact that it was still in it's wrapper even odder than if it had just been a plain unwrapped straw.

He stood at the bar-type counter, where there were three extra large Tim Hortons cups stacked inside one another, with a largish metal globe placed on top, along with a couple of shopping bags. Periodically, he would leave his cups and his globe and his shopping bag, and he would shuffle across the Tim Hortons to an unmanned till. There, he would gently, lovingly place his hand on the UV counterfeit bill detector. After petting the counterfeit bill detector a few times, he would cross the Tim Hortons again and return to his odd assortment of items, the straw in his ear drooping, but still resolutely perched in his ear canal. And there he would stand for a while, upright and proud, before returning again to the counterfeit bill detector and reassuring it that it was not forgotten. Thus, the cycle continued until I finally got my tea and left.

I love Toronto.

I'm a naughty little seamstress

Thu, 01 Oct 2009 01:30:32 GMT

"Woe is me!" I spake unto myself. "For soon it is the month of October, when a young lass's thoughts turn to Hallowe'en, and what costume she should wear! There are but these four weeks until such garments must be donned, and i'faith I wish a new costume for myself."

"But woe, oh woe, and woe again, for I am mid-sewing of another costume, one which fits not the time or season of Hallowe'en, for it doth bear a farthingale, and I should fit not into most bars, nor in sooth through most doors."

(Why the heck am I writing this all Shakespeare-y? Oh well. Too late to go back now.)

I turned mine thoughts to this most terrible puzzle. To complete the costume at hand, and wear old weeds for the festivities, or to blindly turn from the once loved gown and smile on some sunnier garb?

Should I prove fickle and turn from the path as has been laid, wither should I wander? In what manner of clothes should I attire myself? My mind a blank at the thought of something new.

Should I stay honest and true to the goal that I have set, there are many fears yet to be faced. The sleeve, the cartridge pleat, the piled fabric. These demons have slain greater seamstresses than I.

I journeyed forth to the Land of Fabric, to take some solace and inspiration there. My hands found themselves rifling the leaves of an old text, the Fall 2009 Simplicity Catalogue.

Inspiration! An image seen many times before, being in many catalogues past. It married to a memory of mismeasured fabric, many yards of purple velvet, more than needed for the frock coat for which they were bought.

What the image, you ask?

MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Okay, enough with the historicalness (that's what the designer of this clearly said!). I'm going to do essentially a mockup of the blue gown bodice and sleeves in the leftover purple velvet from my pirate coat. I'm going to also make up the accessories that will be for the actual gown- namely the undersleeves, the partlet and the hat. Then I'm going to attach a skimpy little skirt and, in the great traditions of costumes like Sexy Referee and Sexy Carpenter declare myself to be Sexy Anne of Cleves.*

That way, I get
a)practice sewing, cutting and pinning before trying to sew my expensive velveteen!
b)to make a mockup that actually has a purpose!
c)to work on both the gown AND the halloween costume
d)a lot of giggles, because I think this idea is HILARIOUS.

*Other traditional costumes I found,
-Sexy FBI agent
-Sexy Bumblebee
-Sexy Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz
-Sexy Deputy Sheriff (not Sheriff... DEPUTY Sheriff)
-Sexy Freddy Kreuger
-Sexy Spiderman
-Sexy Robin
-Sexy Jane Jetson
-Sexy Eskimo
-SEXY SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS WHY GOD WHY???????

Oof...

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 02:18:22 GMT

That was a really really tiring faire. Rainy on Sunday, and still pretty chilly on Saturday. Also, the costume was a lot heavier than I'm used to. It didn't help that trying to hold back all my usual peasant-y impulses I ended up tense as a bowstring. I really don't think that I'm cut out for court, at least not as a proper lady. Now, Jane Boleyn is another question. The Boleyns are almost as far away from proper as you can get.

So I'm half way through making a court gown without a lot of desire right now to play court. Ah well. It was always mainly a test of my own skills to see if I actually can sew it.

Today's advancement on the court project is drafting the sleeve! Yay! I was a wee bit scared about this part. Bodices I've done before, but I've sewn a grand total of six inset sleeves in my life- two shirts and my pirate coat. One of the shirts has the left sleeve on the right side and vice versa, and the pirate coat is a big ol' mess. I can't check the quality of the other set of sleeves, since they're on a shirt I made for the sisterly one, and it is therefore in Toronto. I'm not counting the square sleeves on my tunics and chemises, since there's no curves or anything.

So of course, now I'm trying to draft my own sleeves. And I also have to draft the arm holes that go with them. I think I have a working sleeve pattern, but I need to do a mockup of the gown bodice to see how it works. That can be tomorrow's project.

Faire pictures, 'cause I can

Sun, 27 Sep 2009 00:17:08 GMT

Oof. Long day at the faire, mostly due to rain. But I kinda feel like posting something... Ooh! Pictures!

Here's some pictures from the Royal Medieval Faire last weekend! I was only there for maybe an hour and a half, so I only saw three shows, but they were pretty good.

Also things are coming along on my Tudor ensemble! Yay!

Underthings! (shirt/chemise drafted by me, hoop skirt adapted from the Simplicity pattern, hair is up for funsies.)

From Tudor Gown

Kirtle (drafted entirely by me, baby!)

From Tudor Gown

Now I just have to do the overgown and all the little accessory things like hats and fake sleeves and so on. Woo!

What is wrong with this week?

Wed, 16 Sep 2009 23:06:19 GMT

Sunday, while going for Timmy's with DJ after rehearsal I locked my keys in the car. This was inauspicious.

Monday, two litres of milk that were supposed to be good to the end of the week spoiled, a loaf of bread bought two days prior was mouldy almost straight through, the train was delayed by a half hour, making me late for work, so I had to STAY late, and then the train was late and no longer an express going back home.

Tuesday, I forgot my lunch and I found out we have a staff meeting at the head office on Friday, which, in rush hour traffic, will be approximately a two hour drive. The day is spent calling grumpy people and telling them no, they can't have their appointments. Also, I bought a carton of milk.

Wednesday, it is discovered that the NEW carton of milk had SPRUNG A LEAK and there was milk all over the bottom of the fridge. Also, forgot lunch AGAIN. Get home, discover that my dog is really sick- needs-an-operation sick, in fact.

This week has royally sucked and I DEMAND a do over.

Hahaha... it's all coming together!

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 02:44:57 GMT

I totally meant to spend the night sewing, but I didn't. Instead I did... uh, well, pretty much jack all. Whee!

[Unknown LJ tag]However, the rest of the week I was REALLY productive. I have all of the inner layers of my kirtle bodice sewn up, including the boning channels. Eleven boning chanels, to be precise. The last bodice I made had only six, but my good bodice has what feels like twelve. We'll see how this works.

I also have the pretty pretty yellow brocade all pre-washed. At one point in my head it was going to be the fabric for the actual gown, also known as the main dress that you see. Then I realized that I am a pasty blonde and that much yellow would make me look like a daffodil gone horribly horribly wrong. So it's the kirtle, or under dress. However, since the kirtle doesn't have sleeves and a train, I've got a LOT of extra fabric. I honestly can't remember just how much fabric I bought (I purchased it nearly a year ago, now) but I think there's enough for another major project. The thing is, I probably won't want it! It's sort of like how I have all that purple velvet left over. I've got a pirate coat made from it, having something else in purple velvet might be overkill.

Also, I just realized- this gown is going to be in my high school (and grade school, for that matter) team colours. Go Wild Cats!

I also bought fake pearls for the trim. I love pearls. I have a whole drawer in my jewelery box overflowing with them. So I wanted pearl trim on the neckline of the kirtle. I know that freshwater pearls can be purchased at Michael's but they're not particularly nice pearls; they're lumpy and have weird grooves on them. Oh, I'm sorry. They have "character." I wanted proper spherical pearls, so fake is the way to go. But even fake glass pearls can go for around four bucks for two 16" strands. Plus shipping. Yeesh.

However, this week I went to Dollarama on my lunch break. In the cutesy little fake jewelery section, tucked away amongst the plastic rings and the "thing on a string" necklaces, were glass pearl necklaces. Fifty inch strands of 8 mm glass pearls.

One dollar each.

I've held them up to a strand I have of REAL pearls. I can barely tell the difference, and only from up close. Since these are going to be going along my chest, very few people should be that close.

I bought three strands, two in white and one in black. It took a heck of a lot of willpower not to buy more.

So. No sewing tomorrow (Friday night is go-see-the-boy night! Yay!) but lots of sewing for the long weekend. Yay!

Now I just have to figure out how to line the stupid thing... I hate lining...

One layer down, three to go

Sun, 23 Aug 2009 03:49:24 GMT

I am so totally amazing!!!!! I actually, all by myself, sewed a farthingale! Yay for me!

The pattern is based on Simplicity 2621, the Elizabethan/Tudor undergarments. It's fairly close to the Tudor Tailor instructions, so I cobbled together my method from both of those, plus a healthy dash of "uhh... maybe this will work!!!"

The base fabric was 90" wide unbleached cotton sheeting. I made the executive decision that since no one will see this but me, I'm making it cheap and sturdy. The channels are 1 1/2" wide twill tape, which is actually labeled "carpet binding" at Fabricland. I've previously mentioned this, but I used polyurethane tubing for the hoops, with brass barb connectors to stick them together. For the ties at the waistband, I used 1" wide twill tape. Not that it matters, but it's brown.

Next time I make this pattern, I need to remember to add a little extra onto the length of the body pieces for a hem. Because I didn't do that for this one, I ended up using the 1" twill tape for a facing.

I completely ignored the instructions in the pattern for the waistband. They were dumb. In the pattern, the waistband is a drawstring that is sewn in place in the front. It kind of hurts my head. I didn't want a drawstring waist at all, though, so I gathered the waistline and sewed it to a solid waistband. It still has ties sewn on at the opening.

I think that's all I have to say about it, other than the possible reiteration of "Woo, I'm amazing!"

Still to go on the tudor dress:
Fix shift (I have one, but somehow I cut it really really wide on one side, so I need to trim it)
Yellow brocade kirtle (fabric and notions are all bought, just need to do it. Also, I need to figure out the trim for the neckline)
Blue velveteen gown (I have the fabric and notions for this, too. Oh,it's gonna be pretty!)

Plus a couple of shirts for real life for me... and a pirate coat for Nick... at least I'm not bored!

Oh, I love the Discworld books

Sun, 16 Aug 2009 20:04:30 GMT

This line is absolutely brilliant, and there's nobody around to share it with, but it made me honestly guffaw, so I'm sharing it with the internet! Please not, all --ings are from the book.

"I'm gonna get medieval on his arse."
There were more pressing problems, but this one intrigued Mr. Pin.
"How, exactly?" he said
"I thought mabye a maypole," said Mr. Tulip reflectively. "An' then a display of country dancing, land tillage under the three-field system, several plagues and, if my --ing hand ain't too tired, the invention of the --ing horse collar."

Things to remember!

Thu, 13 Aug 2009 00:43:37 GMT

-When using 3/8" tubing for boning instead of hoop steel, use 1 1/2" wide twill tape.
-When sewing the twill tape down, sew it on the inside of the skirt
-Sew the edges of the twill tape 1" apart. That way, there is a tube on the inside of the skirt and the outside of the skirt is flat. That way there's no hoop bleed through!

And just as a side note to myself, the Simplicity pattern is kind of short on me. Not surprising, since it's meant for somebody who's 5'6", and I'm closer to 5'8".

And yes, when I sew I use imperial measurements. I also use imperial when cooking. But I measure distances in kilometers. I! Am! Canadian!

More on the tudor gown

Sun, 09 Aug 2009 23:28:27 GMT

Things are progressing on my fancy shmancy Tudor gown. I figured out what I did wrong on a chemise I made a few years back, so I can easily fix it and I don't need to make a new one. Yay!

Also, things are coming along on the hoop skirt/farthingale/whatever you want to call it. I even have the skirt mostly assembled- I just have to add the waistband and the hoop channels.

I must admit, though, I'm cheating on the hoops. The instructions call for hoop steel. Hoop steel is pricey and hard to work with, and I'd have to special order it from Farthingales, up in Stratford. I don't wanna.

Poly-vinyl tubing, on the other hand, is cheap and plentiful and can be bought at Home Depot! And it's really awesome when my Dad buys it for me because he was buying deck screws anyway. Yay!

I've also got the bodice mock-up to a point where I'm pleased with it. This is going a lot easier than expected. I've got all the skills I need- the only thing that's been holding me back so far has been procrastination. Yay me!

Birth-Stravaganza!

Tue, 21 Jul 2009 03:12:28 GMT

Wow. This birthday has been about ninety steps up from last years birthday. I spent my last birthday sitting on the couch eating take-out Lick's burgers, unable to go out and have fun 'cause I had pink eye AND a respiratory infection. Whee.

THIS year, birthday shinanigans began on the Friday prior to my birthday. Nick and I were going to a karaoke competition- he had already made it through the qualifiers and the semi-finals, and Friday night was the final competition. First prize was a thousand dollars. Nick was going to sing "Somebody to Love" by Queen (swoon!) but there was one itsy-bitsy problem: a good chunk of the scoring was for costume. What the heck do you wear as a costume for "Somebody to Love?"

Nick texted me while I was at work. He had figured it out- CUPID! Wings, a toy bow and arrow, a little white bow tie and boxers with hearts on them! My mission, should I chose to accept it, was to go buy a pair of wings from one of the costume shops on Yonge, and also to see if I could find a pair of boxers with hearts.

The wings were easy. I could have got them in any colour, any size. But the boxers? Do you have ANY IDEA how impossible it is to find heart boxers? I checked up and down Yonge- I even went to Seduction, which is a sex shop in case you couldn't guess. I could have bought a tiny tiny sailor suit, but no heart boxers.

Nick picked me up after work and we checked out Oakville place- no luck. We could have got festive CHRISTMAS boxers- in JULY!!!!!- but no hearts.

We drove up to Brampton- luckily, Nick's mom had found not one, but two pairs of heart boxers, one black and one white.

Finally, we were ready to go! We just barely got there in time. Because I declared it to be day one of my mini-birthday-stragaganza, I had my annual birthday drink. Half a pint of cider, I was, to use Nick's term, "shnockered."

Some of the competitors were awesome, some had used up all their good material getting through the qualifiers. One was a screen accurate Mary Poppins singing "Spoon Full of Sugar" and that made me happy. Most of the girls just wore evening wear, no matter what the song was. Mike, one of Nick's friends who also made it through to the finals, actually had set pieces, including a large patio umbrella wrapped in icicle lights.

Nick sang last. And, of course, he knocked it right out of the park. The judges loved him. Of course, it may have also had something to do with the fact that he had the audacity to go onstage dressed like this:

Awww yeah. That's my man. Sorry about the crappy cell phone picture, but I forgot my camera. My friend Amanda took the picture.

Third prize was announced. To me it was a surprise, as I hadn't been horribly impressed with her singing. Second prize, I hadn't actually heard her sing since I'd been outside talking with the smoker types.

"And first prize, better known by his new nickname of 'Featherboy...'"

I squealed and began jumping up and down. Nick politely applauded for a moment, then his jaw dropped and he completely froze in shock. I don't think I've ever seen him completely speechless in the whole time I've known him.

Saturday began sometime around lunch. Nick and I went to East Side Mario's for lunch, which was tasty goodness. We also went to see Kate and Andrew and their boat, because they happened to be down at Bronte harbour here in Oakville. Convenient!

Then we headed off to Hamilton for Colin's annual Barbeque. We only got a little bit lost on the way there. Woo! I got to see all sorts of people whom I haven't seen in months (I never know what's going on in Hamilton to go and see people) which made me very happy. We talked about what people are doing now- some people are getting their masters', some have PhD's. Some people are working at new and awesome jobs, some are office drones- okay, most of us are drones.

Also, Nick finally got to meet MY friends. We've only been going out, what, a little over a year and a half?

Sunday, I had a migraine of death. When I could see straight, I watched all the special features on the Incredibles. Awesome.

Today, my actual birthday, in complete and total randomness, I got a cheque from my insurance company (paying me back for a perscription I needed filled when I didn't have my insurance info with me) and a pair of shoes I had ordered for ren faires from Medieval Moccasins. They're so pretty! And they're the first pair of shoes that I've worn for ren faires that actually make my feet feel GOOD! Woo!

My parents took me out for dinner, I went to look at new computers at Staples (poor little Computron is dying a slow death. I don't take care of her very well.) and then I wrote this. All in all, an awesome birthday weekend.

Yay me!

Huh...

Tue, 07 Jul 2009 01:10:49 GMT

Today I had the sudden realization that in exactly two weeks I will be 25 years old.

Weird.

*edit* I'm not so much weirded out about the 25 thing- I'm weirded out about about almost being 25 and FORGETTING IT WAS ABOUT TO HAPPEN.

Working on my coupe... I mean Tudor

Fri, 03 Jul 2009 01:14:54 GMT

Get it? Tudor? Two-door? Coupes have two doors, whereas a sedan has... oh, never mind.

So, yes! I have embarked on a new sewing project! This time, I'm going for Tudor nobility. Because Tudor nobility is pretty and I am insane.

I recently bought the pretty pretty new Simplicity Tudor patterns (This one and this one. Oh, and I got the Elizabethan one while I was at it). I decided I was going to use them, plus my copy of The Tudor Tailor to franken-pattern up a quasi-historically accurate modular outfit- see if I could throw a skirt on the corset and make it a kirtle, get rid of the pleats and the back lacing on the gown, that sort of thing.

However, I was full of fear. Going by bust size, I'm a size 6 (these are PATTERN sizes, which have nothing to do with ready to wear). The smallest size on the pattern is a size 8. So I let it sit.

Then came faery fest, and the sudden realization that I had started reworking the bodice I made a few years back (the one I wear for playing the Brownie!) and hadn't finished. Some very quick sewing and grometting later, I had a bodice that I thought would pass muster. But trying it on, I realized it not only passed muster... it actually fit! Properly! I could breath and bend and move, but also- well, let's put it this way: Nick was very distracted when I first put it on for Faery Fest. We'll leave it at that.

So I started my franken-pattern. I traced out the front and back pieces of the corset pattern that matched my WAIST measurement (which is a 12)I laid these over my bodice, and was quite amused at how close they were- same front length ,same curve between the point of the bodice and the waist line, all sorts of good stuff. The only difference was that the there was almost no space between them. I traced out the negative space between the pattern pieces, taped 'em all together and then cut them up the middle- all the historical kirtles are just two pattern pieces, front and back, no side piece.

I cut the whole thing out of some poly-cotton gingham that I bought cheap, sewed it up and boned it with cable-ties with a paint stir-stick as a busk. And you know what? It FITS! First try! There's a little bit of wrinkling, but I'm pretty sure that will be smoothed out by heavier fabric that can take the strain of lacing a bit better.

I'm so cool!

Karen and Kelly? YOU explain it to them.

Tue, 23 Jun 2009 02:19:16 GMT

So I was sitting at the Faery Fest pub sing with Nick, listening to Nero's Fiddle. They were singing Roll Your Leg Over, which I have explained previously but shall do so again for our new listeners. All the verses esentially go like so:

If all them young laddies/lassies were (non sexual objects)
I'd be the (related object) and (perform an action that relates and sounds dirty)

So, for example:

If all them young laddies were little white flowers
I'd be the bee and I'd suck them for hours

It's a drinking song, so we make up more verses as we go along and there's about ninety gabillion of them. Are we all up to speed? Good.

I had just interjected a verse and had sat down again, when the second oldest McGrotty child tugged on my sleeve, telling me I should sing the verse she was about to give me. Please keep in mind she is about six years old:

If all the boys were sitting on the toilet
EEEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!!!!!!!!

I gently declined, as I had just sung.

LATER! Nero's Fiddle sang "The Cock Song," which is about a missing rooster named Dick. Clearly.

But the second youngest had other ideas. "It's not about a chicken," she informed me. "It's about a... uh..." She paused, thinking very very hard. I was kind of scared she'd be right.

"A rooster?" I suggested hopefully.

"No! It's a... it's a, um..." she covered her eyes with her hands, then flipped them open as though she was playing peek-a-boo. "Cock!"

I think I may have snorted, trying not to laugh. She did it again. "Cock!"

Having a five year old cheerfully chirping "Cock! Cock!" at you is... kind of weird.

It begins!

Tue, 02 Jun 2009 01:39:44 GMT

(editor's note: I totally forgot to post this. Gregor's Crossing was two weekends ago, now. And I still have to write up the Morrisburg rundown! Baaaaah...)

The first faire of the season was this past weekend- Gregor's Crossing out in Chatham. Yes, I'm only getting around to writing this now. I was Maggie Greystone, the baker's daughter. Once again I scared myself at just how incredibly stupid I can act. By the second day it was determined that nobody can think like me... it's dangerous to your health.

In previous years, I've done little rundowns of all the nifty things that happened at the festivals- a sort of synopsis of all the funny and amusing experiences I had. At this faire, there were just too dang many, I couldn't even really process them all at the end of the day.

So you're just getting the highlights.

Thursday was rainy. The skies opened up just as Dan and I were about to go on stage. This was full on "why the heck are you actually sitting at this stage instead of seeking shelter" rain. But we did have a small crowd who actually got involved. So woo. But I got a definite reminder of why I wanted better shoes than the ballet slippers. Oh, sure, they look good, but they sure as heck ain't waterproof.

Thursday I also learned that Kevin can, and will, make tribble noises while shaking his hair at me, and if I'm tired enough this will, in fact, break my mind.

Friday, it was determined that I need to buy a new belt. The old one was perfectly good- I'd just lent it to another cast member, and he managed to somehow LOSE it. And this is one of those double ring ones from Sword in the Stone that's about a quarter inch thick that I could wrap twice around my waist. You'd think he would notice when it fell off. Sooo, spike20 I'll be seeing you at Pirate Fest for a new one!

I also had kids remember me from the year before. I was doing the ol' "point at the sky and count how many people I can get to stare at nothing" game, when I heard from across the field "DON'T FALL FOR HER TRICKS!!!!!! SHE'S COUNTING YOU!!!!!" Awesome.

Also, there was the "cast party" on Friday night. Eclectic Revival played... and I honestly don't remember any details of the evening! I was too dang tired.

Saturday at the insult game I broke Mandee so badly that she actually had to run off backstage (if you ask nicely and there's enough room, I'll show you my impression of a fighting headless chicken). Unfortunately, Nick and the other Chrises had to miss insult game/pub sing to go set things up for playing at the feast (Kevin stuck around- I guess it's easier to tune a saxophone than a guitar). This led to some problems since there goes a good chunk of our male singers. We ended up doing both girl songs and even attempting Loch Lomond. Bad idea, since we only seemed to know the first two verses and the chorus. I was also in agony through the whole thing, since I forgot my tankard and was belting all the songs with an incredibly dry throat. Never again... until I forget and repeat my errors.

At the actual feast, there was a little girl in a pink princess dress. During a break, I was talking with the boys in the band, and Chelle came over to tell us that she had specifically stayed to hear Celtic music so she could dance to it. Would they play some? They promised to for the next set. I promised that she would dance.

They started playing, and I went up to her and asked her to dance with me.

"I don't know the steps," she whispered.

Contra dance lessons to the rescue! "I'll teach you."

I taught her a few simple steps, and soon we were dancing all over the pub. She was loving every minute of it, which made it awesome for me, too.

Sunday was an exhausted blur.

Have I mentioned I love my job?

I'll get right on that, thanks

Fri, 15 May 2009 02:27:55 GMT

"You- you will be a great fashion designer."

I looked up from the little dress doodles I was drawing as I ate my lunch. A woman, maybe forty or fifty years old, was standing next to my table. This was several days ago, so my exact memory of her appearance has faded, and all I really get is an impression of grey hair, red face, purple clothes and a general circularness.

"Excuse me?"

"You will be a great fashion designer. I can tell. You will be. You know what you can do? You can wear a hat... with a long feather down the back, like a pony tail. You can have that idea for free.

"You could be a fashion model. I used to be a fashion model, and I still could be if I lost a hundred pounds. Don't you think I could be a fashion model?" She paused and stared intently at me.

"Um...?" was my highly intelligent response.

"You have beautiful eyes. They- they say that fashion models all have bad eyesight; glasses hide the loveliest eyes. You should never cut your hair. Cutting your hair is bad luck. The 6/49 jackpot tonight is $16 million. You should buy a ticket with Encore, and you'll win, and you can open a very successful fashion house and be a fashion model. Did you see the Yves St. Laurent collection? They showed it last night on CTV. It was terrible. You will do better. You have a beautiful smile, you don't need lipstick. I see you have some bread and meat there. You shouldn't eat so much bread and meat. You should eat more greens and salads. Bread and meat builds up in your colon. I can't eat whole wheat. I know. I know you will be a great fashion designer."

At this point she wandered away.

Apparently, I have some sort of crazy person magnet about my person. How else would they all find me?

(Please note that the 6/49 jackpot that night was NOT $16 million, but it was on Saturday. I'm kind of kicking myself for not buying a ticket)

It's done it's done it's done!

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 02:56:13 GMT

My costume for Gregor's Crossing! It's done! At least all of the important nakedness hiding parts are done. I still have to do the veil, but that's pretty much just hemming a rectangle and making two tubes.

It's done! It has facings and top stitching and hemming and EVERYTHING! I totally thought it would take me another two weeks- my hand stitching is getting much faster.

Oh there were fearful parts along the way- remembering (after buying the fabric) that linen shrinks, not being able to get the stupid hem level on the tunic, plus the usual "which side is the right side again?" problems I tend to have with sewing. But now it's DONE and I can be full of joy.

Pictures will follow. Now I sleep.

Bah

Sun, 19 Apr 2009 03:30:42 GMT

In my continuing quest to be stingy, I enlisted my Mom to help me make a dress form today. My previous attempt to make a dress form from duct tape... didn't work as planned. It got crushed, and stretched, and in the end had measurements that weren't in the slightest bit like my own.

Poking about on the internet, I found another technique- wrapping yourself in plaster bandages to get a solid form which is used as a mold, then making a paper mache positive from said mold.

This did not go so well. It started off as a lovely day, so I put on a garbage bag as a dress so I didn't cover myself in plaster. It was a lovely sunny day, so we laid out a drop cloth on the deck and then I had Mom cover said garbage bag in the bandages.

Not sure what we did wrong, but the plaster would. Not. Dry.

Making things better, it got cloudy and the temperature dropped. You all may have thought it was a lovely day, but you weren't wearing a garbage bag and being covered in wet bandages with icy plaster dripping down your legs, were you?

We started at around three and cut me out of the silly thing at 5:30 because my back and feet were in agony from staying still so long. It took nearly 15 minutes (or at least that's what it seemed like) to cut me out of the stupid thing, at which point I nearly collapsed.

I dragged myself upstairs, drew a bath that was as hot as it would go, then promptly fell asleep in the tub.

Oh yeah, and screw being Thrifty McGee. I'm buying a freakin' dress form.

If you decided just to skip to the end, I'll sum the whole thing up for you. Today, my Mom got me plastered, I wore a garbage bag, then I collapsed and passed out.

It's the Ides of March! Beware already!

Sun, 15 Mar 2009 17:17:01 GMT

I forgot to celebrate Pi day, but hooray for the Ides of March!

Theatre Questionaire, Stolen from Adri

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 02:33:04 GMT

Copy the questions, etc etc etc.

LAST SHOW ADDED TO YOUR RESUME:
"Jekyll and Hyde: The Musical." Finally have a musical on my resume, even though I only played chorus.

LAST SHOW YOU AUDITIONED FOR:
"Jekyll and Hyde: The Musical." Woo!

DID YOU GET IT:
Uh... yes.

LAST SONG YOU USED AT AN AUDITION:
All That Jazz and As If We Never Said Goodbye. Showing off my low register is fun!

FAVORITE MUSICAL(s):
Depends on what I've seen most recently.

FAVORITE PLAY(s):
Ibid.

FAVORITE ROLE YOU'VE PLAYED, AND FROM WHAT SHOW?
Mad Mary Teach. Everything clicked for that character.

FAVORITE ROLE OVERALL THAT I WOULD LOVE TO PLAY:
Beatrice in Much Ado About Nothing
Rosalind in As You Like It

SUPERSTITION:
Do NOT say the M word!

YOUR GOAL IN SHOW BUSINESS:
To be remembered.

FAVORITE DIRECTOR(s) YOU HAVE EVER WORKED WITH:
Oh gosh... Tom Plott, Mike McLay, Chris Rosser, Matt Moore, Anjie Schwartz, Steph Davidson... the list goes on.

WHAT WAS YOUR VERY FIRST SHOW?:
"The Jolly Christmas Postman." I played Mama Bear.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A DANCE SOLO?:
Nope. But I have choreographed a couple of dances.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A SINGING SOLO?
A couple of lines in Jekyll and Hyde, and I've led a few pub sings.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN THE LAST PERSON TO TAKE A BOW?
Nope.

HAVE YOU BEEN TO NEW YORK?
I was supposed to go, but SOMEBODY went and crashed a plane into a building or two.

HAVE YOU BEEN TO LA?:
No. No real desire to go, either. I'm a theatre girl, not movies.

WHAT'S THE SCARIEST PART OF AN AUDITION?:
I agree with Adri: "The awkward silence as they read your resume and just before they ask you to begin...."

WHAT'S THE BEST PART OF AN AUDITION?:
Nailing it exactly the way I wanted to.

NAME A SHOW YOU WOULD NEVER DO AGAIN:
Louis le Grenouille. I don't speak French.

NAME A SHOW YOU COULD DO FOR YEARS:
That depends on the cast an the direction. I could have done my high school version of R&J forever, but the one week of it I did at Mac was quite enough, thanks.

WHAT ARE YOU AUDITIONING FOR NEXT?
Nothing lined up right now. Until I get something sorted out that I'm living in the general vicinity of the rehearsals, I just can't afford the transportation.

DO YOU KEEP IN TOUCH WITH PAST CAST MEMBERS?:
Most of my friends I met through shows.

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW IMPORTANT IS GETTING PAID?:
Depends on the show and what has been promised. You tell me I'm working for nothing? Fine. You just don't pay me? Screw you.

SOMETHING EMBARRASSING OR UNEXPECTED THAT HAPPENED TO YOU WHILE ON-STAGE?:
The Big Mac with Hamilton Urban Theatre. I had a short fight scene. Thrown against some stairs, watch my children die, say a line, run at one of the murderers, try and hit him, arm is grabbed and twisted behind my back, neck is creepily kissed, shot in the stomach, collapse to ground

Sounds good? Throw in a mike pack falling off, breaking my necklace and scattering pearls and batteries across the stage. Add in a creepy witch who was in the wrong spot so I had to leap over her to hit my mark (there were other witches around, it was the only way to get there). Bad news all around.

WHO IS THE MOST DIFFICULT PERSON (ON STAGE OR OFF) THAT YOU HAVE EVER WORKED WITH?:
Yeah, like I'm going to shoot myself in the foot when I may or may not have to work with said person again.

EVER BEEN NAKED ONSTAGE?:
I've been in lingerie, and I've had my butt fully in view because measuring is for wimps.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN KILLED?:
Only as Lady MacDuff. I lean more towards comedies.

BEEN DRUNK?:
Never played drunk, definitely never been drunk on stage.

PLAYED SOMEONE HALF YOUR AGE?:
Characters who act half my age, yes. Hellooooooo Lettie!

PLAYED SOMEONE TWICE YOUR AGE?:
Niobe from Love of the Nightengale was three times my age. I got very good at age makeup by the time that show ended.

CRIED?
Yup, in Measure for Measure. Which in turn made my Mom cry. Whoops.

FIRED A GUN?
Nope.

BEEN DRENCHED?
Only when it's rained at a Faire.

BEEN IN A DREAM SEQUENCE?
Does Midsummer's Night Dream count?

BEEN KISSED?:
Yup. And because at the time I had never had an ACTUAL kiss, I needed lessons. Go me.

Sooooooo close to being done

Sat, 28 Feb 2009 18:04:28 GMT

ARGH! I'm almost done! I'm so close!

Ba-Zam!

From Nick's doublet

Nick's doublet! Woo! The whole thing is lined, the front edge and the collar are all top stitched, everything's pressed, I just have to finish the lacing holes and it's DONE!

Now, on things I've made for myself, this lacing holes have been the quickest thing. However, All the layers of fabric ended up being too thick for the little grommets I had. So I'm doing the stupid things by hand.

I'm doing a pretty good job, on them, though. They're all big enough that the lacing easily passes through them, they're evenly spaced, and the more recent ones even look pretty good.

From Nick's doublet

On each side, there's twenty of those, hand stitched with two strands of embroidery floss. Because of the shine on the fashion fabric, I used one strand each of two different shades of gray. They blend seamlessly. The holes are made with a stiletto, widened with a pair of manicure scissors (put the end of the scissors through the hole, open the scissors and force the weave open) then forced completely open with a knitting needle, which is left in place while I do the first bit of stitching so the hole doesn't close up. No cutting the fabric at all, so it's nice and strong.

I've got 22.5 of the holes done, and I've pretty much mastered my technique so the rest should go smoothly. And now I've jinxed it.

Darn you e-bay!

Thu, 26 Feb 2009 02:52:29 GMT

I swear, I was just looking for a box. A simple, oval bentwood box with a hinged handle. It would be nice for holding sewing stuff, and it would be simple and it would not be plastic. I would not feel like a goof carrying it around, and it might even have room for a small project in it.

So I went on e-bay. I searched for "sewing box," other searches having come up with cheese boxes.

And I found this.

I would never be able to convince myself to pay for this, and I would smack anyone who tried to give it to me, but ooooh, it's pretty. And PURPLE!

Things to do

Tue, 24 Feb 2009 04:11:34 GMT

1- finish doing the lacing holes on Nick's doublet. That's all I have left to do, then it is DONE! I had PLANNED to use grommets, but there were just too many layers of fabric, so I'm doing them by hand. I got four done yesterday, so there's thirty-six holes left to do... this may take a bit.

2- I got my fabric today, so now I need to draft the patterns for my kirtle and tunic.

3- I also need to preshrink the fabric- I have the kirtle fabric ready to go, I just need to do the tunic and the veil (which may end up being a hood, or I just might end up wearing a flower crown and using the fabric to make handkerchiefs... we'll see.)

4- Clean my room. It may not SOUND like a sewing thing, but my bedroom floor is the largest flat surface I have that is safe from the dog. Do you have any idea how hard it is work with fabric that a dog is lying on?

5- get to Michael's and buy crewel yarn (I'm thinking yellow as a nice contrast to the brown collar. I can't seem to get away from brown and yellow, no matter how I try!) to do the embroidery for the over tunic's neckline. That might not get done in time, but even if it isn't I can just bring the frame and a medieval-y sewing kit to the faires and I'll sew and be educational.

6- actually sew the kirtle and tunic. This will probably take the least time out of everything. And now I've jinxed it.

I can get that all done in three months... right?

The Saga of Mr. McFluffersons, the Valentine's Present Plush Puppy

Mon, 16 Feb 2009 00:23:07 GMT

Cathoo:
Check your email

We have sent you pictures!
You really should look at them....

[check's e-mail]

Chris:
Why do you dress poor Mr. McFluffersons in a sugarbowl hat?

Cathoo:
Because he was there

Chris:
WHY MUST YOU FORCE WEAPONS OF WAR ON ONE SO YOUNG??????

Cathoo:
He's a Swedish Puppy-Dog
They all must join the army
And they get to keep the knife!

Chris:
Poor Swedish Scottish Husky dog... I believe him to be a consciensous objector.
Or however the heck you spell it.

Cathoo:
That works

Chris:
He shall flee across the alps, venturing through Europe, and finally swimming across the English Chanel to return to the lands of his ancestors, the Scottish McFluffersons.

Cathoo:
Dave can't stop laughing...

Chris:
There, he shall make his home among the highlands, where he shall heard sheep and possibly pull them about on a tiny sled when it snows.

Cathoo:
My tummy hurts from laughing...

Chris:
Finally, FINALLY, he shall have found his place in the world, and the sun may set on his great and adventurous story of one dog, fighting for what he believes in against all odds.
But he's gonna keep the hat, 'cause it looks cute.

Cathoo:
Will he have a cup of tea?

Chris:
He shall have three.
One to try it, one to see if he actually likes it, and finally one which shall be so perfect that it shall ruin all other tea for him.
FOREVER!

Cathoo:
I'm crying from laughing
You hurted me!

Chris:
Charlie...

Cathoo:
Mr "Charlie" McFluffersons

Chris:
Hooray!